This Carousel

This Carousel

I sit there wondering as the tears soak into my face
I wonder if the spinning will stop because I am too dizzy to breath
I wonder if I’ll be stuck inside here forever, while they watch me cry through the broken glass
When the wind blows over me, I shatter again
Standing there, trying to find the missing pieces of me day by day, but the voices in my head spin me around too fast in this carousel
Always telling me to quit
When people ask why I cry
I want to tell them that this carousel is killing me and I am sinking in my own shadow
I yell through the broken glass, but they can only see me and judge, make assumptions without really hearing me
When I cry, I feel these drills drilling into me
Headaches like thunder
These clouds hanging over me
I hold in my screams
Everyday it spins me round again
My mind is killing my soul
Burying me beneath myself
Waterfalls of acid tears pouring down my cheeks
I hold so much pain inside myself
Deep down inside of me where I drown
There is a demon that screams in my ear at 3 a.m
I am the girl that comes to school with dark circles under her eyes
Quick fading scars from the demons last attack
Let me off this carousel I call from inside
And I smile
a soft one
but a true one
And this carousel slows
And stops

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