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Month: April 2019

How I Feel

How I Feel

I feel like a ticking bomb, a girl who’s unaware of why she feels how she does every day. I feel brokenhearted but I’ve never been in love. I feel sad as I laugh and cry. I feel rejected from all my goodbyes. I love to dance, let things go. I want be a writer, recognized in homes. I want to be read by future generations, pondered over, known as a sensation. I want it all. But none of that could make me happy. I have everything in front of me, what’s painful is what’s inside of me.




Careless movements

You make me feel this way

You make me peel, unravel on the floor

Your shoes piled up

By the door

You fall, tumbling over

You make me seem small

But All that you miss

Is now broken



Hollow glass

Empty moonlight

Dancing by the edge

Hanging by a ledge

This is nothing

This is me everyday

And that’s what hurts most to say

Heart breaker

Heart breaker

Hearts hang on strings

Attached to a woman’s fingertips

They droop and drip

Splashing the water

They dance in the night sky

Shadows abundant



Beauty, soul of an angel

Hearts racing, hearts divine

Red smears boxes

Drips like stripes

Stripes of solitude

Imagine it all done it time

Shoes scraping concrete

Concrete one hundred feet high



Some reflect perfection

Edited versions of the truth

Half shown spotlights

Shine for a minute

They glimmer and soon disappear

Day by Day

Day by Day

When the day rolls over

Folding inwards before reaching out

Crystals of trembling anxiety dance in our eyes

When the day rolls over

I sing with my ears

I dance with my eyes

You don’t know me well enough

To know that when I crumble

I feel it in my heart

I feel it in my stomach

I feel pain comfortably

So I accept everything that rolls over me

Shadows in the mirror

Dancers on the screen

Singers on the stage

When the day rolls into a new one

My eyes still tremble open

Holding little light

Holding less serenity



I’m comfortable in my restlessness

An ocean drifting with the waves

I’m okay with being sad

I understand there’s nothing wrong with feeling

Except my hearts been ripped from my chest

And place upon billboards

For everyone to see but no one cares

They only laugh

A bitter laugh



There’s nothing wrong with being emotional

Fragments of ourselves on our faces

There’s nothing strange with my cries

Except you in the mirror

I don’t dance because I like it

but because there’s nothing else to do

We call our sins on our telephones

Deep into dawn

We whisper heartaches tears into the receiver

Until there’s no one left to call

We go to the store to fill our heart not our stomach or our mouths

I washed you away

You were gone

I wanted you back

But I was gone



There’s two of us

Both of us

We sit in a strangers house,

A vacant house,

Not our house

There’s three of us

Pain and rejection sit in our heads

We sit in a hotel room

Because there is no home for us

There’s four of us

While I was only blooming,

Before divorce papers could sweep me away



I knew the love was true

When I spotted your eyes in my mirror

You looked as though I’m everything

And all you’ll ever have