The Poet

I’ve always felt lonely

Surrounded by people

I’m too deep within my thoughts

To be here in this moment

Something about turning into a different me

Something about the feelings inside

Something about all my memories

Something about the way words float around me

Something so lovely, so lonely

Thoughts in the head

Need space to disperse

You are cut out for more than

Soft waves and being liked

You deserve the most

Smiles may light up your day,

That’ll be enough

And you deserve everything else

Your worth may only be measured by one trait

Yet I’ll stand here and recognize everything

I would decorate my skin

In order to hide flaws

Now I emphasize them

To enhance my beauty

I’m stuck in a mirrored world

Yet they don’t see me

I’m terrified.

It’s tearing at my insides.

Love is like this,

The feeling haunts me.

Ever gone reaching?

Grasping?

And your arm is too short.

Or your muscles are too weak.

And something stands in the way.

I worked on words for a living

Starting before the age of seven

It took parts of me away

Crafted an artist in my soul

Fluttering with butterfly wings

Across balconies and rivers

Aching to float away

Hurting to feel okay

Who am I

to pronounce feelings

which belong in you?

We remain unalike,

Unseparate

Who am I?

Dripping like gold next to my chin

leaving a scar on my left ear

Red and bruised

Heat radiated

Then seeped into my flesh

Electric waves

Thunderstorms

On mount Fuji

Iced fruits alongside boiling tea

All wrapped in plastic

Dancing in train stations

While crying in temples

She danced in every poem

Cried in every second

She loved every second

But she could barely breathe

I liked you so badly

How your eyes would smile at mine

But your eyes were too handsome

It drove me wild

Too intoxicating

Fluffy and depressed

Is how I felt

The sky looks beautiful tonight

She reflects everything I hold

Rose and Cobalt

Running wild

Cutting ties

Breaking bones that used to cradle my soul

Focusing on the sweetness in the roses

Yet he’s behind me and he’s pulled me in too far

So all I’m able to do is stare into is his eyes

How does love caress your skin?

Does love dance from side to side and swiftly bump into you in the ballroom

beneath the quiet light of an ancient chandelier

so purposefully, so graceful?

Or does the feeling haunt you?

Does it ache inside of your shivering bones in the night?

I want to do for myself

Not for girls

Not for boys

Not for parents

or for strangers

Not even my favorites

Because I will now begin assigning more love to myself

More care

Genuine and appreciative

Fully internal

Can I place my emotions into my words?

Is that my talent?

Or is it a technique using patterns,

during all times scattered?

green ballet shoes

placed under my toes

I wondered if you’d fit

you did